Have you ever felt isolated, unwanted, unloved, and/or unimportant? That’s what loneliness kind of feels like. You feel as though you are shut-off from the world you so desperately want to be a part of.
Loneliness affects people from all walks of life — even people who on the surface don’t appear to be lonely. They have many friends and plenty of people who care about them, and yet they feel lonely and isolated. They feel as though they are emotionally disconnected from the world and their surroundings, and they have difficulty making the necessary changes to improve their state-of-being.
Loneliness isn’t something you feel all of a sudden when you wake up one morning. It is something that grows and develops over time. It’s therefore not one thing, but rather a combination of things, experiences and individual moments that come together and eventually leads to the feelings of loneliness. For instance, the loneliness you are feeling could be the result of hurt feelings, of persistent rejection, of ongoing criticism, or of neglect. Feelings of loneliness can also result from a broken heart, from losing someone you love, from a lack of meaningful social relations, or as a result of a social fear that leads to shyness.
Whether your loneliness results from a broken relationship, the death of a loved one or pet, or from a prolonged time of social isolation, a common unifying feeling is that you may feel powerless to relieve the pain of loneliness. Relief is perceived as coming from social connection which seems to depend on the reciprocal actions of others.
If you want to live a more satisfying, happier life alone, first you have to start believing that you can. You have to decide to think differently about aloneness.
And, at the same time, you have to start doing things differently.
The first step to mastering the art of aloneness is changing your perceptions of aloneness. Instead of viewing it as a shameful condition associated with loneliness, pain and emptiness, you need to begin to think of it as one of freedom, growth, and opportunity. At first, this isn’t easy. Changing these deeply ingrained preconceptions about aloneness – especially before you’ve changed your reality – is the hardest part of the process. It requires a leap of faith and relentless perseverance. But, simultaneously, you are going to start changing your behaviors.
Here’s why: Our perceptions produce our emotional responses. Our emotional responses drive our behavior, and our behaviors create our reality – the quality of our lives and the circumstances in which we live. Put another way, we are what we think. If you think of aloneness as a source of loneliness and misery, then the simple fact that you are alone can make you feel sad and lonely, and that can lead to inertia and depression. So, instead of having the energy to go out and do something that will make you feel good, energized, and inspired by the world around you, you end up sitting around and feeling sorry for yourself. Your life becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy – because you do the things that produce the very results you don’t want to achieve. That, in turn, continually reinforces your belief that aloneness is a source of pain instead of joy and opportunity. You are trapped in a vicious cycle. Your negative thinking is producing negative behavior, which in turn is reinforcing your negative thinking. You’ve got to break the pattern – by thinking differently about aloneness, acting in ways that reinforce your new attitude, and focusing on the opportunities inherent in your situation.
Creating healthier relationships through personal development
Mastering the art of aloneness will not only enhance the quality of your relationship with yourself and improve your life, but it will also dramatically change your relationships with others. Instead of seeking another person to make you whole, you engage in relationships with a sense of being complete and whole on your own. Learning greater self-sufficiency builds your self-esteem and confidence. It also allows you to participate in relationships with others out of conscious choice, rather than from a place of neediness or of fear that you won’t be able to take care of yourself.
Every step of the way, this course supports your progress by providing a clear understanding of how and why these solutions work. Your life is going to change for the better.
Loneliness v Solitude
What is Solitude?
But is it Safe?
The Sacred Breath Practice
Not Good Enough
Feeling Not Good Enough: A Case of Mistaken Identity
What is Self-Image? What does it feel like?
You are not your Thoughts
What is our Soul-Self?
Quick Release of Painful Feelings
Connecting with Spirit
What are Mantras and How do they Work?
OM: The Core Mantra Meditation
Guidance on Self-Acceptance
Needs we have to meet to feel Alive
The need for attention
Mind, body connection
Purpose and Goals
Connection to Something Greater than Ourselves
Creativity and Stimulation
Sense of Security and Safety
Intimacy and Connection
Sense of Control
The Need for Status
Creating a Sacred Garden Space
Tap into Mother Earth Energy
The Great Outdoors
Imperfection is Freedom
Perfection is Death
Fear of Failure
From self-abuse to self-confidence
Live from your Heart
The Importance of Choosing Positive Emotions
Mindfulness Meditation Walk
How to Start
Walls around the Heart
The Powerful Energy of the Heart
Build Bridges not Walls
Leaving the Past Behind
How Positive Emotions create Connection with Others
Consciously take every opportunity to feel Positive Emotions Deeply
Heart Breath Practice
Heart’s Pleasure List
Ways to Fight Loneliness if you Live Alone
Loneliness v Living Alone
Get Organized to prevent Inertia from Taking Hold
Creative Things to Do
Wondering What to Do when you feel Lonely? Some Tips
Create Something New
How to be Whole on your Own
How to Cope with Being Alone at Night
Taking Care of Yourself
Keeping Yourself Safe
Know when to Seek Help
Connecting with Others
Life is Interesting
Audio: Life is Interesting
The Beauty of Being Single
You Will Find Peace with your Past
Laughter and Play for Wellness
Laughter And Play For Young And Old
What Is Wellness?
Why Is Wellness Important?
Dimensions Of Wellness
Laughter And Your Wellness
How Laughter Supports Your Health And Wellness
12 Ways To Laugh
Play And Your Wellness
What Does Play For Adults Really Mean
How Should You Play?
Why Do Adults Play?
The Benefits Of Play For Adults
How To Play More Often
Ten Ways To Play
Work And Play
Surrendering to the Now